Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I’m a 25 year old teacher teaching at boys school & I have colleagues younger than me. I caught one of my students telling her he wanted her as his teacher instead & it hurt my feelings. They compliment her a lot. It makes me jealous. What do I do?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

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Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have a reading level above third grade

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When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

What are some hard rock or heavy metal bands that are overrated?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I can count

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

How can we become the best humans? How can we trust each other?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand how hurricane paths work

Why did my bipolar girlfriend split up with me?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

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When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Could humans be selectively bred, like dogs, to create 2 subspecies that can no longer have offspring? Do I not understand selective breeding properly? Im not worried about the moral implications, just the science please.

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

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I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

How do you know if your husband loves you truly and deeply?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

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I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

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I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Why are Republican politicians so afraid to oppose Trump?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

How can I stop overthinking and take action more quickly?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I actually pay taxes

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I see through liars

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I can read